I started this blog to share Justine’s life after she was killed in a car accident last year. It was therapy for me. I’ve written a book about her life and for a year and a half I have told many stories of her 29 years. She is never far from my mind but I don’t like dwelling on her life (and death) as much anymore. I think this is a healthy move forward.
I know many people who never recover from a death in their family. Whether it be a parent, sibling or child they just live the rest of their lives grieving. I can’t do that. I have to believe that everything happens as it should and I have to find joy in my life. I realize that everyone grieves in their own way and I’m not criticizing anyone. I feel sorry for people who can’t move on. It would be a horrible existence.
There is a man who I pass at a bus stop several mornings a week who wears rabbit ears. He was featured in the local paper. The reason he wears his Easter costume daily is because his daughter loved rabbits and she died. I thought he was trying to promote awareness for some cause such as drunk driving but when I googled it, it says he wears them to remember her. I’m sure most people would feel badly this man is stuck in grief.
People say I’m strong. I’m sure many people think I’m selfish or cold. Maybe I’m all of those things but it works for me. I just can’t spend every day feeling I’ve lost something and cry. I can’t think that way. It’s life, it happens and we must believe our loved ones are happy and at peace. I think of Justine on a permanent beach vacation, free from worry and stress. She is happy now and that makes me happy. I believe other family members who have crossed over are there too and they are having a wonderful life there. I’ll go there one day too and we’ll all be together again.